Dear Late Night Nursing Mama

Wake up in the morning feeling like P.Diddy... Just kidding, that is Ke$ha and pre-baby me. Now I'm a permanently exhausted pigeon with two beautiful babies. Truth is, motherhood comes with a whole lot of stuff I never realized. Sleepless nights, fogginess, mombrain, random whiffs of spit up, leaky body parts, it's all part of the gig. It also comes with so much LOVE, and that's the key, the glue that holds us together. It's what's with us when we wake at 6am for the day after three, four, five+ wakes in the night that last 10+ minutes each time. Well, here we are heading into month 8 without a restful night in sight. (And so I hear there is an 8 month sleep regression that I'm really looking forward to!) So this is for you, my friend and fellow mama who has either been there, is there now, or soon will be.

Dear Late Night Nursing Mama,

I see you. I feeeeeel you. I am you.

Nursing is such a beautiful accomplishment and can take a physical and mental toll on us mamas. Did I ever tell you that I was more afraid of nursing than actual labor? Because I was. I was so irrationally nervous about it. I never had made the wholehearted decision to nurse, I figured me and my babies would decide how it worked - bottle or breast. After literal blood, sweat and tears I had to make a decision whether or not to pursue with nursing or not. I slayed my fears & I survived, as we always do. I love every minute of being able to nurse my babies now, but I'd be a big fat liar if I didn't admit that those multiple late night nursings that continue to last well into my son’s 7 months of age didn't drive me on the edge of bonkers.  (My husband would say I fell off that edge a long time ago, but he isn't writing this blog is he?!)

Here’s a few things that helped me get through... 

#latenightnursingfeed - I found this hashtag while I was mindlessly scrolling through Instagram with my first baby back in 2015.  It makes you feel so much less alone to be able to read that other mama's are going through the same emotional rollercoaster you are at that moment. There's even some humor in it. I’ve read it and even contributed to it when I was nursing Emersyn in the middle of the night for her long, early-in-life feedings and I do the same now. Check it out!

sleep training - I started this when Mav was 5 months old and I wish I started sooner. I did it for Emersyn and having a schedule worked so well for us.  Did I mention that everything you do for baby #1 suddenly is forgotten and you have to relearn everything for baby #2? It may be because of mom brain but it may be our brains compartmentalizing the craziness we've endured. I'll go with the latter. Anyway, there are tons of different sleep training methods out there and I'll post more about my method in a follow up post if you're interested. Since there are so many, do your research for what works best for you and your family! This restful down time (even though it may only be ten or fifteen minutes) helps me give my whole attention to my oldest babe for a small break in the daily chaos and keeps the attention jealousy at bay.

coffee - hot, iced, reheated 3x, in a mug, a to-go cup, a solo cup - any kind, all kinds, any time of the day, you name it, I drink it.  I usually had one in the morning and one in the afternoon - right after feedings, that way baby Maverick wasn't hyped up on caffeine all day. But this is truly part of my survival technique ;)

my mom - I call her once a day. Hahahahhahaha, thats so funny.  Realistically we speak on average 5 times a day and thats only counting by phone. Add text and Instagram DMs and you'll think I'm ridiculous.  I hope me and my daughter are this close when she is older! Okay, I got super side tracked.  My mom really is such a good listener and totally cracks me up, so it's always a nice little break from reality and chatting with her is a great stress relief because - she gets it. She always offers solutions that I had somewhere tucked in my brain and had forgotten about. If your mom's not around, find a friend, relative or colleague to chat with. It helps.  

remember this is just a season - Tryyyyy to embrace each moment and focus on baby’s needs.  It will pass soon, babies don't keep! Utilize big sister or brother as much as possible, it makes them feel useful and helps you too! Emersyn loves tossing the dirty diapers for me when we are done, or getting his bib ready. So keep on keepin' on, mama. Keep wiping bums. Keep nursing the never satisfied baby. Keep cleaning. Keep hugging. Keep crying. Keep laughing. Keep your head up. It's not easy, but it's worth it.

go outside - ok not in the middle of the night, but in the day. Even if you REALLY aren’t in the mood. Take a walk, go grab coffee, take your toddler to the park to release their energy, or just walk to your mailbox - SOMETHING. It reminds you that their is life outside of the realm you’re caught up in!

Sidenote- I wrote this during nap time in my cardigan that I just noticed has what I'm hoping is baby food on my shoulder, was interrupted to wipe a toddler bum and I'm en route to the microwave to reheat my coffee for the second time.

Be the light and spread the positivity. Next time you see a mama with her infant, remind her that she is a dang rockstar! You never know who needs a little encouragement that day. You got this, mama!

With grace & gratitude,

Caitlyn Torres

#caitlyntorres #motherhood #latenightnursing #nursingfriendly #nursing #parenthood #breastfeeding #latenightnursingfeed